Sunday, February 10, 2013

Damn Skippy, I'd watch it


"Survivor - Texas Style"

Due to the popularity of the "Survivor" TV show, Texas is planning to do one entitled: "Survivor - Texas-Style!"

The lucky contestants will all start in Dallas, drive to Waco, Austin, San Antonio, then over to Houston and down to Brownsville.

They will then proceed up to Del Rio, El Paso, Odessa, Midland, Lubbock, and Amarillo. From there they will go on to Abilene and Fort Worth. Finally back to Dallas.
 

Each contestant will be driving a pink Prius with 15 bumper stickers which will read:

1.
"I'm A Democrat"
2. "Amnesty For Illegals"
3. "I Love The Dixie Chicks"
4. "Boycott Beef"
5. "I Voted For Obama"
6. "George Strait Sucks"
7. "Re-elect Obama In 2016"
8. "Vote Eric Holder Texas Governor"
9. "Rosie O’Donnell Is Texas Born"
10.
"I Love Obama Care and Chuck Schumer"
11. "Barney Frank Is My Hero"
12. "I Side With Jane Fonda"
13. "It's Bush's Fault"

14. Islam Is A Peace-Loving Religion"

and the last sticker is…
15. "I'm Here To Confiscate Your Guns"

The first contestant to make it back to Dallas alive wins.

8 comments:

crankyjohn said...

Isnt that the car of choice in Austin? A pink Prius with steer horns on the hood.

hiswiserangel said...

~sigh~ That's the problem, cj. The contestants would be cheered in Dallas, Houston, San Antonio, and Austin. It's the rest of the state that would have their taters on the fire.

Anonymous said...

cranky - Nope - they are just 'weird' in Austin, not crazy - well a lot of the low info types might be.
hwa - ever been to SA? They 'might' make it through - in the dead of night.
Actually, since Real Texans are some of the most hospitable and tolerant folks around, most of us would just laugh and point at them. And then offer to take them to lunch at Whataburger!

hiswiserangel said...

I visited SA probably 30 years ago. From it's current state of politics with the La Raza mayor, I dare say it's quite different from what I remember. :-)

I stick to my little corner of Texas tucked safely away in the Panhandle.

Odysseus said...

Top Gear tried a much milder version of this as a joke just trying to cross the boot-heel of Alabama.

They almost didn't make it.

My only addition would be that contestants must agree with all of those stickers.

hiswiserangel said...

Ooooo, Odysseus! Scramming with the Stars! Pair a Hollyweird Anti-gun Lib with an everyday Lib, put 'em in a pussy pink Prius and set 'em loose! Hell yeah!

Film at 10.

Bryn said...

Add a mandatory 3 hour stop at The Alamo to the itinerary.....
On March 6th of course....

Anonymous said...

May I return fire?